My Vac Obsession

When I first suspected I was on the autism spectrum, I began my journey by doing research followed by on-line testing and a doctor visit. Among the symptoms that struck close to home was a desire to collect categories of things, such as rocks or bottle caps. I didn’t collect rocks or caps; instead, I collected vacuums once upon a time.

By the way, I learned also during my research that Autism stands for:


I have the “sometimes myserious” part down pat! It all started with one vaccuum cleaner. It grew from there.

I bought one after moving into a new apartment in 2005. The apartment building was only a few years old and the apartment itself was the nicest-looking one I ever lived in. I wanted to keep it “spic and span”. I didn’t buy a regular run-of-the-mill looking vac. I bought one that had the feel and look of something out of this world. Its accessories were tools to play with. I know it sounds strange and I promise I’m not making this up.

I then bought a hand vac that attracted the kid in me too. And another. And another. Down the road, I got a stick vac that looked neat too. They were more like “gadgets” than vacs to me. Back then, one of my favorite places to shop was “As Seen On TV”, the shopping mecca for gadgets. I bought from that store at least three mini-vacs and I do mean “mini” sized used to eat dirt off of tables and desk tops.

I went so far as to purchase a robot vac to vacuum the carpet and a robot vac to mop the floor. I don’t recommend these items though. The robots would do what they were made to do but they were often interrupted when they would invariably get stuck like under the recliner or in a corner. I got tired of rescuing them and later chunked them both.

You might be wondering about the cost of this collection. I did not buy the herd at once. It took years to amass this collection resembling my own vacuum store.

I ventured beyond the vacs to other similar items. One was a Hoover vac that sipped up water from off the floor too. This really came in handy when the toilet overflowed. I didn’t forget my car either. I bought a hand car vac and another car vac that would also suck up spills. Then, there was the carpet steam cleaner. I didn’t much care for the steamer after it burned my hand giving me third degree burns.

My obsession faded when I moved back to my home state a few years ago. I didn’t have room at my Mom’s house for my “vac” herd. I got rid of most of them except for a couple of them that were my top favorites.

I miss my Sharks, Hoovers, and Dysons. Vaccuuming sure isn’t as much fun as it used to be.


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