Flowers is not on my list of favorite topics. I occasionally take the time to look at flowers, but most of their names are unknown to me. I confess I can name only two kinds and that’s tulips because of their shape and roses because I’ve seen plenty of people receive a dozen or so. I know enough about a rose garden to know that they are accompanied by thorns. Roses are a delight to the eyes and sweet smelling to the nose, but the thorns are a pain to the flesh.
My Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) has roses and thorns. I gave my ASD the nickname of “Billy”. It is therapeutic for me to say to myself “It’s just Billy” when my ASD slaps me in the face. Here are some of Billy’s thorns…
People react to the mention of Billy with skepticism in their face. If I really had Billy, I would be spinning in circles and slapping my arms like the kid in the movie. Or, I would be the female version of the suspected aspie Albert Einstein.
I frequently recall a painful or embarrassing moment and cringe. It could be a moment of yesterday or as far back as first grade.
When you tell a funny story and it is taken seriously. When you tell a serious story and it tickles funny bones.
In panic mode when someone asks me for directions.
When the noise level rises too high, I picture myself as a tiger on a tear.
I had more imaginary childhood friends than real ones.
I’m too weird to be normal but too normal to have a Billy.